You couldn’t make it up, Jessie J states. At that moment preparing for her first album release in eight years, deeply enamored with her newish partner, and at long last the parent to a young child after struggling to conceive for a decade, on top of the world. Then in March she was diagnosed with cancer in her breast.
The musician, birth name Jess Cornish, is famous for telling it as it is. The LP, the provocatively titled album, was supposed to be an transparent story, addressing every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last made an album (endometriosis, losing a baby, broken romances, gaslighting, suicidal thoughts) with her usual frankness. The first single, the song No Secrets, was released in April. But by then there existed a huge secret. The cancer. Then next release, her song Living My Best Life, debuted in late spring and Cornish was giving interviews about how she was living her best life, while at the same time living with breast cancer. Four weeks after she went public, and in early July she had a mastectomy.
She gives me her best “What the fuck?” glance. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m conducting every media appearance, and they ask, ‘Any updates?’ and I’m, like, ‘Uh, nothing really’” the singer has just had to call off performances because she’s yet to undergo reconstructive surgery.
We’re at a studio in London. She is dressed in a light brown synthetic jacket, jeans with elaborate white patches, cream boots and large glasses. Think rocker vibe meets 70s singer aesthetic. “As if I’m in the 70s and I should have a boyfriend with a big tache.” Easy Rider, I say, referencing the movie. “They used to call me that!” She beams. Cornish is sharp-witted, irreverent and blunt. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is planning to attempt her standup debut soon. “I like entertaining. During performances I frequently joke about the crowd.”
Cornish was preparing for an appearance at the ceremony when she discovered a mass. “I immediately went to get it looked at, had an ultrasound, and they were, like, ‘It seems benign; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I was, like, ‘Yet I sense it. I have arm pain and pins and needles in my hands whenever I get up.’ And they replied, ‘How about a biopsy?’ It happened on March 28, the post-birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The doctor told her if it was bad news she’d call on the start of the week. By then she had persuaded herself it was nothing. The way she tells it, it was simply too inconvenient to get cancer when she had so much on.
“We’re two weeks away from releasing the album after a long hiatus and no new music. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Can you talk at six?’ And I was, like, ‘Oh, it’s a Zoom, it won’t be anything.’ So I join the call expecting it’s all going to be positive, and she informs me, ‘You might want to sit.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she says, ‘Unfortunately but your test results have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” How did you respond? “I said, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ The first thing I thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Some men find me challenging due to my self-awareness
She viewed the procedure scary and bizarre. “I dislike anesthesia. You’re escorted. During crises you roll down in a bed, but now I just strolled down with a gown on and my backside out. Like a dystopian scene.” But, she notes, she’s been blessed. No chemo, no radiotherapy, just the procedure. “It’s terrible, but you know what? Luckily it was detected early. The surgery happened four months ago and my right breast now appears as a fruit under fabric.” She smiles again. “The nipple was preserved.”
The follow-up procedure is both medical and cosmetic. Her breasts, she observes, are now “asymmetrical. The implant is larger than before. So inconsiderate! I thought, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a hard period. How offensive! Ironically I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be flawless. Cancer ruined that plan.”
The singer is accustomed to medical issues. She believes her perspective on the cancer has been so upbeat because she’s used to physical challenges. Many times they occur alongside career highs, serving as a tap on the shoulder, or shock, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Truly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘You having a good time? Sit down.’ Since childhood, it has often paired with achievements for me; a serious or unusual issue has affected my well-being.”
She recalls to her youth, already starting her career featuring in the West End in the production (she was selected at the age of 9). That’s when she was diagnosed with the cardiac issue WPW, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as lightheadedness and palpitations. “I rehearsed between visits on an IV drip, and returning to the hospital at night.” She fast-forwards several years, and 17-year-old Jess has become part of the trio the group while attending the Brit School. “I secured a deal, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was planning to release songs in the year 2020 I had a automobile accident and my voice box shifted and I was unable to vocalize for a year.”
Hey, I say, hold on, I need a moment. At just 17? She nods|agrees
Eva de Vries is a passionate book lover and local writer from Eindhoven.
